Now this is embarassing.
That lovely length of fire hose which now adorns Chertsey's cratch was a present. From someone. And I can't remember who.
I am so sorry to appear so ungrateful. I'm not, really - it's a fabulous bit of hose, and I really want to say thank you.
Please could the kind benefactor jog my memory, so that I may prostrate myself before them in an orgy of gratitude and remorse.